America's "Frankenstein" side...

Earlier this week a musical artist named Kanye West interrupted another musical artist Taylor Swift as she was accepting a VMA award for Best Female Video. He apologized and assured Ms. Swift he would let her finish then turned to the audience and announced that Beyonce had "one of the best videos of all time."

Of course the behavior was denounced by all but a few loyal West fans and comments came from all the way up to the White House. President Obama said the incident was "totally inappropriate" and said of Mr. West "He's a jackass."

And also of course the White racists started hollering about "ignorant Black rappers" and the Black racists yelled back about "rap getting no respect as a musical art form", Liberals started hollering about how it wouldn't have happened if African-Americans had been given equal opportunity and Conservatives yelled back about how Blacks should pull themselves up by their own bootstraps and comedians are saying that Kanye West interrupted Patrick Swayze's death to say that Michael Jackson's was the best death of all time... etc. etc. etc.

As usual in this country, everyone's out trying to make political hay while the sun shines down on this sad event. Everyone has an axe to grind and a finger to point. What amazes me is that so few people are pointing their finger at the REAL culprits... us.

You see, in my opinion this is not a "race" issue. It's not an "opportunity" issue. It's not even "character" issue (well, not entirely). It's a "Frankenstein" issue: we've created yet another monster and let it loose to roam the countryside destroying villages & razing crops. We've all seen this happen with sports stars, child actors, musicians, singers, politicians... They do something well, become popular, then more popular and begin to surround themselves with "fans" not friends.

Sports figures ask for obscene amounts of money to play a game, and we give it to them. Singers ask for obscene amounts of money to do what they'd do for free in their own garages or churches, and we give it to them. Actors that used to wait tables or park cars while they acted in community theaters ask for obscene amounts of money so we can escape our troubles for an hour or three, and we give it to them. Politicians accept obscene amounts of money from corporations then ask us for obscene amounts of money to fund those same corporation's pet projects... and we give it to them.

Soon, where there used to be a human being striving to express themselves in their music, or achieve excellence in their sport, or make the world a better place stands a monster, driven by greed & need & the belief that the world loves them (or owes them) so much that they can do what they want and nothing will come of it. And we let them get away with it because we need their music, or the excitement of watching their sport, or the escape their movies bring us, or the influence they wield on our behalf.

As money & popularity & "power" & drugs & alcohol slam into their lives in ever-increasing doses it can completely overwhelm the "good human" behaviors we all use when we want to get along with others and reveal the "dark" nature we all try to hide. Then hubris takes over and they begin to feel that they got there on their own and they don't need anyone else which is the fatal lie. What these people really need are TRUE friends that are not afraid to look at them and say "You're an ass. Stop it."

We have lost something in this country. We no longer know what it means to be a success. We look at those who have achieved notoriety in their field and think they are successful because they have money or power, etc. Rich people get to buy or do what they want. Rich people suffer no consequences. Rich people are therefore successful. How sad.

I'm afraid that I tend to agree with Ralph Waldo Emerson on the subject. "Success: To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded!"

The saddest thing of all is that it's very likely not going to change. The same Human nature that causes some of our celebrities to act like asses is the same Human nature that causes some of us to idolize them. Oh, we tolerate their dark side until it boils over and burns us. Then we rise up out of righteous indignation and depose the corrupt in power, boycott artists that exhibit crappy behavior, refuse to watch bloated sports celebrities. But eventually our ire will recede, we'll step off our soapboxes and in the end, all that will happen is that, at best a new human will rise to slip into the vacated position and at worst the same one will seem repentant and be forgiven and the cycle will repeat. As long as our nature remains the same, the cycle will remain the same and for some reason... that seems to be the way we want it.

Parental Expectations

When the parent-birds gently coax their baby-birds out of the nest, they hope they will begin flying before they hit the ground, but I'm sure that some part of them expects to have to swoop in through the trees and rescue them. So, when my youngest daughter, Caryn moved out a few months ago, it was with great relief to my wife and I to see her wings stretch out, catch the wind and lift her into the sky. We did not however expect to see 2 little jets pop out of her shoes or the pilot's goggles that she lowered over her eyes as she came to hover like a harrier jet before us, salute & blast off to face the world. She has been kind enough to stay close to our little tree and we see a Caryn-shaped blur swoop past our field of vision every once in so often and smile.

Caryn has taught us many things over the last 21 years. Apparently important lessons like: Food coloring turns black when more than 3 colors are mixed together and is difficult to remove from floors and walls even when NOT in the shape of tiny hands & feet. One can make music with one's belly-button. That between herbivores and carnivores betrayal is as sudden as it is inevitable. That a child doesn't have to be 1/8th alien to do amazing things. And no matter how motivated they may be, hamsters cannot fly. As a parent I have been constantly amazed by the things my children have thought I needed to know, and Caryn has been teaching me these things since she began finishing my sentences for me at the age of 6.

And there were other lessons, too. A young girl's fascination with swords can turn out to be prophetic of future Spiritual Warfare. That the character attributes of compassion and strength can develop in response to Life's hardship and handicap. That no matter how many mistakes a parent can make... kids can still grow up to be mighty warriors.

We are proud of Caryn. Proud of all our children. They are all growing into their gifts, learning, exploring and taking ground for the Kingdom in their own unique ways. That's also something, as a parent I hadn't "expected"... that may not be the right word... You see, in the middle of raising my children, it was as much as I could hope for that they would just survive. That they'd get through grade school, middle school, puberty, junior high and high school without getting into a fatal accident, hooked on drugs or prematurely making my wife a grandmother. I became focused on just getting them through the next grade, the next phase intact & relatively healthy. Then one day, I turned around... and they were all gone. They weren't hard to find, they all stayed close. We see them quite a bit, marvel at what happens in their lives. Sometimes my wife & I smile and wink at each other 'cause we know what comes next; sometimes we cry for the same reason.

And now, Caryn-our baby-is an adult. Out in the world, standing on her own, sword in hand scanning the horizon for "new targets." Like The Lord of the Rings' Eowyn, standing between the forces of darkness and the people she loves... and watching the darkness tremble.