"For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love."
—2 Peter 1:5,
One of the most important things we can do as fathers is “Train up a child in the way they should go so that when they are old, they will not depart from it” (Pro 22:6). It struck me that this passage in 2 Peter nicely complements the phrase in Proverbs: “...the way they should go...” I’ll show you what I mean.
"...make every effort..."
The raising of children is worthy of more effort than just Sunday School attendance. A child's foundation is so important that we should make every effort, every day to establish it. It should be foremost in our minds and hearts.
As a new parent 30 some years ago I was struck by not just how helpless my infant son was, but the sheer amount of time and effort it would take to shape this little life. In retrospect, "every effort" is an apt description of effort required in raising a child.
"...to add to your faith…"
One of the first things we ask of our children is to take certain things “by faith,” or “because I said so.” Without the requisite life experience to recognize which things and situations are safe compared to those that should be avoided, children need instruction and guidance to avoid the dangers that hide in plain sight around their world.
“The stove is hot, don’t touch it”
"Look both ways before crossing the street”
“Jump, and I’ll catch you”
Learning to trust parents lays a foundation that they will one day apply to God. As we build trust with our children, we prepare them to listen to an outside voice to avoid pitfalls and embrace safety.
We instill in our children the reality that we will feed and clothe and protect them and that they should have faith that we will continue to do so. The ability to believe in something with no concrete proof, something larger than ourselves is a universal truth important to our development. Even scientists must sometimes have faith in a presupposition necessary to hold together some theory or other.
"… Goodness …"
One of the very next things we teach our children is the difference between good and bad, instilling in them the concept of morality.
"Don't bite your brother"
"Share your toys"
"Don't flush the cat... again"
Intrinsic to this concept of morality is the value of good and the consequences of bad and if taught consistently, it eventually creates a habit of doing good out of a heart of goodness for its own reward.
"...Knowledge..."
Building on this foundation of morality, knowledge is added to empower the goodness in us to do good. Once we understand the WHY good things should be done, knowledge creates better methods of HOW good things should be done.
"...Self control..."
As children develop into social creatures, they are pulled in many directions by any number of different forces; appetites, peer pressure, parental direction, etc. Self control becomes the channel through which goodness flows from us into the world. The channel that limits a river to a certain path is the same channel that prevents the river from becoming a raging, destructive force. One's ability, properly channeled, focuses our influence into paths driven by goodness, planned by knowledge, and executed in faith.
"... Perseverance ..."
Now the near-adult is called on to complete tasks more difficult than those they have yet faced and easy success is not guaranteed. We are faced with greater challenges on a more frequent basis. It could be a job, a career, college, or a difficult friendship. The key understanding here is that nothing is accomplished if nothing is completed.
“...Godliness...”
With these tools at our disposal, living as a representative of Heaven here on earth becomes a tangible possibility. This is the turning point. Following a goal to conclusion is quite a bit more difficult without tools acquired during childhood.
"...Mutual Affection..."
The blending of all these stones into a strong foundation is expressed now in the form of care and concern for others. The second of the "Greatest Commandments" mentioned in Matthew 22:36-40 (...love your neighbor as yourself.) and further defined by Paul in Romans 12:10 "Be kindly affectioned one to another with Brotherly love; in honor preferring one another."
"... Love ..."
With the example of brotherly kindness living in us, the greatest commandment: Love God, comes more easily to us. Well, at least it can be more easily understood. The working out of this kind of love is the target of a lifetime of effort and is best taught to our children, not by route, not by catechism, but by example.
"So don't lose a minute in building on what you've been given, complementing your basic faith with good character, spiritual understanding, alert discipline, passionate patience, reverent wonder, warm friendliness, and generous love, each dimension fitting into and developing the others. With these qualities active and growing in your lives, no grass will grow under your feet, no day will pass without its reward as you mature in your experience of our Master Jesus."
—2 Peter 1:2 , The Message
(Original author unknown, substantial editing and exposition by R. Scott Bettis)